Slowing down after an injury reminded me of an important lesson
I'm focusing on what I can do instead of what I can't
Sometimes life teaches us lessons we don’t want to learn. This has been the case for me recently as I deal with a broken and dislocated rib and an injured diaphragm. I’m terrible about pushing myself too hard, usually just plowing forward. I don’t do “slow” well, and I manage much of my Ehlers-Danlos syndrome (EDS) discomfort with movement and physical activity. Staying still isn’t really in my wheelhouse, but I’m having to learn to slow down.
I’m now able to do basic daily activities such as feeding my dogs and horses, going to work, and running errands, but I can’t do anything more physically demanding. While I can feed my horses, I can’t clean up after them. I can’t dump or scrub water troughs, mow the fields of my small farm, or even empty the dishwasher, as the bending and turning motion is still too awkward.
People sometimes pitch in and help to give my body a break from the strain, but usually I can do what I need to do. Right now, though, my awesome parents and neighbors have been helping me with a variety of chores, and will probably continue to do so for several weeks.
I’ve grudgingly had to accept that I don’t have a choice. I have to, as my counselor says, “rest hard.” In other words, I need to focus on letting my body heal, which means prioritizing sleep and rest. It drives me crazy to be at home knowing I can’t do the things that need to be done. I’m trying to let that frustration go, as it’s not helpful. Being upset doesn’t fix the problem, it only makes me miserable. And with my EDS, stress and anxiety can set off a pain flare if I’m not careful.
As a result, I’m trying to occupy myself with activities that I don’t often have time for, such as sewing. I’m not particularly talented, but I enjoy quilting and have made a few basic quilts for friends and family over the years. Since sewing is something I can do right now, my dad pulled my machine out of storage, cleaned and oiled it for me, and brought it to my house over the weekend. I’m excited to make some items, even if it’s just new holiday bandanas for my dogs!
I’ve also been trying to spend more time with friends. It’s easy for farm life to become all-consuming, and I often have to make a point to do things outside of the equestrian realm. Since I can’t ride or handle horses right now, I have a lot more time to meet up with people for coffee or a bite to eat. Even as I heal, I’m going to work hard to continue doing this, as connection is so important.
Some experiences teach or remind us of important lessons if we can see through all the static. As I get back into sewing and spend more time with friends, I’m reminded that maintaining a healthy balance in life is critical to managing stress and boosting my emotional health — both of which are closely intertwined with my EDS symptoms. Life is always a balancing act; right now, I’m finding new ways to even out my scales.
Note: Ehlers-Danlos News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or another qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Ehlers-Danlos News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to Ehlers-Danlos.
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