When the pain in my shoulder subsides, I know I’m in trouble
Strangely, my injury stops hurting during a flare-up
When I feel that sort-of-painful, sort-of-numb vibe in my right arm and shoulder, I know I’m in trouble. It’s not numb in the sense that I can’t feel it, but rather that I’m not processing the pain I know I’m experiencing. That’s when my damaged right shoulder has passed the point of no return. It’s difficult to explain, but there’s a tipping point where my shoulder goes from hurting terribly to feeling only an echo of pain, and that means I’ve irritated it terribly.
My right shoulder has been a mess since I sustained a bad soccer injury at 15 years old. I wasn’t yet diagnosed with Ehlers-Danlos syndrome (EDS), and I had a breakaway to the goal. The defender chasing me couldn’t catch up and instead used his foot to hook my ankles while I was in a full sprint, catapulting me into a half-somersault.
I landed on the back of my right shoulder and broke my collarbone, tore my trapezius muscle, and dislocated my shoulder all at once. It’s given me trouble ever since, and while proper physical therapy after my EDS diagnosis and regular bodywork have made a major difference, there are still times when my shoulder flares up, transporting me back 20-plus years to the initial injury.
It’s a strange sensation — one I’ve always struggled to describe to my doctors, physical therapists, and bodyworkers. I know that my shoulder hurts, and once I begin to do anything to it — use a heating pad, get massage therapy, etc. — it seems to wake up from its semicomatose state and come back to life in a tidal wave of discomfort.
I likely don’t feel the full effect of the pain because I mentally block it out, but I don’t think that’s the whole story. I just don’t know what the other part of the story is!
Sometimes this pain happens because I overdo it and keep pushing even when my shoulder is already sore. Other times, it may be the result of a singular incident, such as rolling onto my right side while I’m sleeping. And then there are times when I have no idea what caused it to flare up.
When my shoulder reaches this point, my right arm does a kind of “dead hang” at my side. I think it’s an unconscious protective mechanism to keep my arm as still as possible to minimize the pain. I can move my arm when my shoulder flares up, even though my range of motion is diminished. But even when I walk, it just hangs limply at my side unless I make a concerted effort to swing it.
Pain meds, bodywork, and time are the only things that help, but recovery tends to be a slow and painful process. I always have to remind myself that taking care of my shoulder may cause some pain in the short term, but it’ll provide me more relief in the long term. In addition, it’ll likely take several bodywork sessions and some ups and downs before my shoulder settles back down completely.
These flare-ups are frustrating, unpredictable, and hard to explain. No one questions my pain, but I still wish I could describe it more accurately — if only to help others. I’ll keep trying to put the sensation into words, in hopes that, one day, someone else will understand and say, “Yes! I know exactly what you mean, and I don’t know how to describe it, either!”
Note: Ehlers-Danlos News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or another qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Ehlers-Danlos News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to Ehlers-Danlos.
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